im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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