You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
