why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
as a side note pls kill me
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
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