he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
