you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize