yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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