so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Hippo gnu deer
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize