Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
