The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
