they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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