My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I can't turn off my feet"
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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