So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize
