my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
we made out on top of his cat.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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