i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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