Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Randomize
