My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
