Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Randomize
