I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
We talked him into tasing himself.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Randomize
