Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Be still, my beating vagina.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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