who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
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