We're like a lot better than the average bears
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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