Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
