Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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