btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
