he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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