If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i will never coherently bang her
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
