He disabled his match.com account in front of me
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
