Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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