8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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