i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
