Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize