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• (703): View more from Virginia

  fucking a dude

  (703): View more from Virginia

  i mean: fucking a, dude

  (703): View more from Virginia

  wow, that comma made all the difference there

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying

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• (214): View more from Texas

  I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad

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  Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)

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• (931): View more from Tennessee

  On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!

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• (518): View more from New York

  I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.

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• (435): View more from Utah

  I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives

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  Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom

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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."

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• (318): View more from Louisiana

  A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo

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• (925): View more from California

  You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.

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