My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
