I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
