thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
