take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
