I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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