It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
He had one of those small greek statue penises
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
