Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
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Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
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I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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