YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus