Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
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