Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
True strength comes from lack of pants
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
