brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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