Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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