i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
