So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
