Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
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I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
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Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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