this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize