yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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