she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
