The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize