Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
